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Hand and Associates Learning and Mediation Services

 804 479 0002

Don't Agitate - Mediate!

My Blog


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When All is Write in the World!

Posted on May 3, 2013 at 6:18 PM Comments comments (20)
How much time do you spend texting, tweeting or emailing when a phone call would have been more pleasant and appreciated?  I believe we as a society have moved away from talking to one another in deference to scripting it into a not so well verse few words of text!  Wassup wit dat?  Help me understand - do we not like the convo anymore?  Let me know ur thoughts!  A bit curious.

Mediator Effectiveness - Same sex marital issues

Posted on April 26, 2013 at 8:18 AM Comments comments (15)
In today's world of expanded tolerance and change - should a mediator be able to demonstrate empathy working with a same sex couple experiencing marital issues or relational problems to be effective?  Looking for comments as I do this research.  Where does one park their value system to be an effective facilitated neutral in this process.  Besides same sex marriage and unions seem to  be having more societal acceptance.  What say you fellow bloggers????

Power of Opposites continued

Posted on April 5, 2013 at 8:04 AM Comments comments (16)

We can often obtain what we want most by conversely expressing what we like least.   This all started because I wanted to learn about the world of twitter and what it meant to “tweet”.  How do I follow others?  How do I get others to follow me?  My daughter often encouraged me to be on regularly and just write or more precisely “express myself”.  But what do I have to write that others want to read and then comment about.   However, it occurred to me that I like others simply wanted to be heard and have some attention.  Now, mind you, this medium has proven to be an excellent way to communicate in the moment and has changed peoples lives around the globe – but ok what about me.  Whose life will I change and to what end?  It then occurred to me that there are things I want to say to not only engage others, but to also provoke thoughts.  Therefore, this maiden voyage of verbiage attempts to explain why and how this journey begins.   I have been exposed to a process called Polarity Management – in this process if one can ultimate your greatest fears it can lead you to your greatest opportunities understanding that there are polarities that co exist and as a result can help us to understand how we function with the “highs and lows” of each like taking in the good oxygen and letting out the not so good nitrogen in order to breathe.  It happens and we just do it without even thinking about it.  Makes sense in a simplistic kind of way.  So let me ask – are you able to talk about what you really like least about your significant other? Your boss?  Yourself?  In order to make better about what you most want out of life; or better yet what life has to potentially offer you?

The Power of Opposites

Posted on March 22, 2013 at 9:21 AM Comments comments (31)
     Have you ever noticed that what motivates us the most are the things we want the least?  Why is it that we spend so much time acting the opposite of who we really are not to accomplish/be what we really are?  I am not a social scientist or behaviorist  - but I am someone who has spent a significant part of my life doing just those things to only desire the converse results.    

      That is what has sparked me to write this narrative.  How many others of you out there in this world of ours share this same phenomena and function as if it is our norm when in all actuality, we are simply aiming for the opposite results.  The Power of Opposites, I believe makes us who we are – really!!!   What is the energy behind all that?  Is it because we do exist in a parallel universe in which there is an exact opposite of who we are and the motivation slips thru from time to time to make us do what we do?  It has already been demonstrated that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction – so why not our own actions? Maybe this parallel universe keeps us going and doing simply because it is our opposite or converse reality.   

    I will spend time on this narrative not trying to justify or even understand those opposites – but rather to just raise the questions and observations that you as the reader must answer or relate for yourself.  Much of what I offer will be random thoughts or questions you too may have pondered but not really taken the time to respond.  Good luck on what you get from my rambling.   I will try to keep it simple – yet thought-provoking.  Complicated enough to be able to break down into smaller parts, and yet what I am really seeking is a way to engage when life can sometimes be so closeted.  If what I say here prompts you to strike up a conversation or ask a friend or your significant other another related question – go for it.  Or maybe jot down your own related thoughts so that this leads to one huge mind map across many many minds of unrelated readers.  Know that all this is coming from a very private and introverted individual – who is now opening himself up to the world.  Let’s face it – power is about control and if in fact you feel you have no control – claiming your opposite might just be a way of accomplishing your goal – hmmm!  Yes!  Think about it!!!