INSIGHT Two   Role reversal – if I can see it – I can manage it – maybe??   Ever asked the question from/ of others – “Is that how I really act? Is that how people really see me?”  Steve Erkle (character on TV’s Family Matters) may have said it best, “Did I do that??”  Sometimes the man/woman in the mirror is not always a pleasant sight to reflect, but sometimes we just need a visual.  In doing some marriage and couple facilitating/coaching – one of my favorite activities is to have the clients participate in role reversal.  In this process, the husband/wife or partner/partner portray the role and actions of the other to demonstrate how the one acts, speaks, or even treats the other.  

This is particularly revealing, as one is able to see when portrayed by his/her mate.  Even through some “over the top” demonstrations – there is typically sufficient validity about what is demonstrated when that behavior is reversed for direct display.  The Erkle question becomes real – “I do that?   Another version of this activity for single clients is to illustrate – for self the opposite of whom you think you are in order to reach an acceptable medium of who you would like to actually be.  The whole idea is to think about your personal current reality and consider what you may need to do in your life – regarding how you react to others, how you want others to treat or react to you and then take the risk and just self adjust.  Are there times when we must take that risk to do something differently with and about ourselves in order to create and manage change in our lives?  Opposites in this respect are not only enlightening but also empowering!!!